SHOOT YOURSELF IN THE FACE WITH AN ELEPHANT GUN?

(In retrospect, perhaps this should be aimed at the people responsible for making this film rather than those who were somehow entertained)

No! Do not do this, that is, unless you enjoyed a little something called "Derailed." If this is you, and you did enjoy the film. I am so sorry. Maybe the elephant gun was a little harsh, but PLEASE do not procreate.

I cannot believe this (not using the word film) thing was made. It was so unwatchable, so poorly written. Here is my gift to you: Jennifer Aniston is the bad guy, she's married to the normally brilliant Vincent Cassel, but you figure this out the minute you see them together (he's "raping" her). There, now I've ruined it. If you had any interest or thought you might like to see this thing, you owe me, big time. I may have just saved you 2 hours of your life. 2 hours I will never get back. Live! Get out there and live those 2 hours! It's too late for me.